tansali paparazzi

COULD I BE FALLING IN LOVE?

 

I look at him and my heart finds comfort,

He stares at me and his eyes spell love

I think about him and I find myself smiling,

When I kiss his soft lips tears of joy feel my eyes

His touch gives me warmth

Every time I talk of love, I see his glowing face

I find myself sinking in deep thoughts about him

When he is out of sight, my heart craves for his presence

 

The Question is could I be falling in love?

 

1.       THE TOY GOES TO....
                Tom had won a toy at a raffle. He called his kids together to ask which one should have the toy. "Who is the most obedient?" he asked. "Who never talks back to mother? Who does everything she says?" Five small voices answered in unison. "Okay, dad, you get the toy."

2.      NO. 1 ON OUR LIST - LITERALLY!
                  My father was completely lost in the kitchen and never ate unless someone prepared a meal for him. When mother was ill, however, he volunteered to go to the supermarket for her. She sent him off with a carefully numbered list of seven items. Dad returned shortly, very proud of himself, and proceeded to unpack the grocery bags. He had one bag of sugar, two dozen eggs, three hams, four boxes of detergent, five boxes of crackers, six eggplants, and seven green peppers.

3.      COME DOWN TO MY LEVEL
                    An illiterate woman boarded a plane from enugu to abuja in nigeria. She was booked for an economy class seat. Just after the plane took-off, the woman stood up and went to sit in the first class cabin. The flight attendant went to ask her to go back and sit in econmy class because that's where the ticket allowed her to sit but she refused. She had paid and wanted the best seat. Then the attendant informed the Jnr. pilot. The Jnr. pilot went and spoke with the lady and she still refused. Then the Jnr. pilot went to inform the chief pilot. The chief pilot said, I am married to an illiterate therefore i'll go and talk to her. The chief went and whispered some words to the woman and she peacefully stood up and went to her economy class seat. The attendant and Jnr. pilot surprisingly asked, sir what did you tell her? The chief pilot said: easy guys, i just told her that first class is not going to abuja, only economy class is.

4.        FAMILY TREE
                      A little girl asked her mother, "How did the human race appear?' The mother answered, 'God made Adam and Eve and they had children and so was all mankind made." Two days later the girl asked her father the same question. The father answered, "Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved." The confused girl returned to her mother and said, "Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from monkeys?" The mother answered, "Well, dear, it's very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his."

5.         I'M THIRSTY
                       A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later......."Da-ad..." What? I'm thirsty. Can you bring a drink of water? No. You had your chance. Lights out. Five minutes later: "Da-aaaad....." WHAT? I'm THIRSTY. Can i have a drink of water?? Itold you NO!! If you ask again, i'll have to spank you!! Five minutes later....."Daaaa-aaaad......" WHAT! When you come in to spank me, can you bring a drink of water?

I have observed that there are basic factors that affect behaviour in children. Factors ranging from race, background, environment, upbringing etc. affect behavioural difference in children and are contributing factor to how one child differs from another. A great psychologist Jean Piaget whose work I am particularly engrossed with, claimed he can mould any child’s behaviour regardless of these factor, thus suggesting that children are born empty vessels and that every child is a product their immediate environment.

The issue of nature versus nurture is still an ongoing empirical study in psychology, and I personally lean towards nurturing than I do nature; I believe that every child is capable of greatness, however a lot of external factors contribute to whether or not such child becomes great or a nuisance to society. I agree with 96% of Piaget’s theories on child development and its effect on adulthood, however I also believe that there are some unique characteristics that a child is born with, if not how can one explain a three year olds constructive thought pattern, some kids are just born smart; but this is not the aim of this writing, I will expand on that some other time.


I am currently researching an additional factor that may also contribute to behavioural difference in not only children but a progression into adulthood; the birth position of a child and how it can affect behavioural pattern. These patterns progress into adulthood and in most cases manifest in relationships, leadership skills and personal choices. This is why some men/ women in relationship tend to unconsciously resume the role of a nurturer, while others are only used to receiving and find it some worth difficult to give or understand others even though they expect others to understand them.

The birth position is a huge determiner of behaviour children cultivate, especially in societies where children are exposed to abuse or denied the privilege of being a child. In Africa for instance, some children cater for their parents at a very tender age, children at aged twelve are bread winners to the whole family by hawking on the streets. These kinds of children are vulnerable and tend to go about life attracting people to nurture. This has a huge impact in their behaviour and outlook on life, its affects their self-esteem, relationships, confident and level of trust.

In the movie “riding in car with boys” Drew Barrymore’s character had a son at the age of sixteen and had to put her dreams on hold because of the pregnancy, due to the circumstance she felt a kind of resentment towards her son mainly because of his father and the son somehow at a very tend age started parenting his mother. For emphasis sake the boy wanted to go to university outside their small town, being an only child he felt the need to be responsible for his mother; he had a girlfriend who could not understand his need to be everything for everyone. What really struck me was even as an adult he carried on this pattern and always tailored everything to suit everyone but himself, towards the end he confronted his mother wanting to know why she was his responsibility and how he didn’t even have a childhood due to it. By the way this is a true life story.



I have met people who cannot receive compliment, make bad choices because they do not see themselves as deserving anything good, they always feel the need to fix things and people, they take responsibility for the wrongs others do. I recently met a young man about my age whose girlfriend was cheating on him and he was really taking responsibility for her actions. Whenever I come across people like this, I am particularly interested in their family background, upbringing and most importantly birth position.
For instance a first child tends to assume the responsibility of nourishing others, the in between children are more relaxed, rebellious and somewhat nonchalant ; this maybe due to the fact that not much is expected of them so they are usually engrossed in themselves and sometimes come across as selfish.

In balancing out birth position in child rearing I believe parent should always consider what position the child is and if such child has siblings. Parent must understand that children receive love differently depending on how they are wired and their birth position in a family unit, single parenting, adoption and so forth. Parent should create a balance of responsibility between the child and the parent. There are chores parent should not enforce on children; if you cannot take care for a child don’t have any, or have more than you can cater for and expect one of your children to play mother to their siblings. I am in no way implying that children should not be responsible for their young ones but it should by no means become the reason for their existence.

In conclusion birth position is vital when considering how best to raise any child.
This is just my opinion for that may not agree with my view whatever works for you is fine. Consider this as food for thoughts.

Rebecca

I'm going to take you to church

and make you confess your "SINS."

They go to church and the father makes the little boy sit in the
confession booth and he closes the door.

The Boy says: "Dark in here."

The Priest says: "Don't start that again!"

 

THIS IS MY CHURCH NOT YOUR FATHER'S HOUSE!

Tansalites REE D (Rita Dominic) and VAN VICKER may have signed multi-million naira deals to become ambassadors for Nigerian Telecom giant GLOBACOM.  

There has been a rumour for months that Globacom signed up Nollywood and Gollywood actors to become ambassadors for the brand. Van Vicker has been participating in the Glo Rock and Rule tour for months but had not signed on to become an ambassador until now.

When contacted, Rita Dominic would not confirm nor deny the good news. However, some soft sell magazines are already reporting that she along with Kate Henshaw, Desmond Elliot and Mike Ezuruonye were spotted recently entering Digitrack Studios in TBS Lagos Island where Glo was purportedly conducting a photo shoot.

Actress Uche Jombo may have confirmed the rumours when she uploaded her picture taken at the photo shoot to her Facebook Profile.  Other confirmed Ambassadors are Ramsey Nouah, Nnoso Diobi, Chioma Chukwuka-Akpotha, Funke Akindele who recently starred in the blockbuster comedy JENIFA, Ini Edo-Ehigwina who was added just a few weeks ago and Mona Lisa Chinda.  The deal is rumoured to be for 2 years and will cost the company billions of Naira.

Apart from Gollywood's Van Vicker, it is rumoured that the Company is currently in negotiations with Jackie Appiah and Nadia Buari to represent the brand.  Globacom has opened up operations in Ghana and is looking to expand business by signing these bankable stars who are popular all over Africa.

Globacom has shown its commitment to Africa through these deals and we hope that fellow Tansalites wish them well. 

JANE BOND
Sunday, June 14, 2009

Dove Media Controversy
I never threatened to sue RCCG —Ope Banwo
By Samuel Olatunji
Sunday, June 14, 2009

• Ope Banwo Photo: Sun News Publishing

Showpiece Index

Today, we bring you the concluding part of the Ope Banwo interview which we started last week. In this no-holds-barred interview, the former CEO of Dove Media spoke on the RCCG politics that drove him out of Dove Media, his deals with Charles Novia and other issues.

What went wrong with Dove Media?
First, I will like to say that I have nothing but love and appreciation for Dove Media and Redeemed Christian Church of God because they gave me the opportunity to get into the industry where I’m getting a lot of benefits from now. But I would say I made mistakes and everything was my fault because the CEO takes responsibility for everything. 

The mistake was that I trusted people I shouldn’t have trusted. Moreso, I knew nothing about the entertainment industry and I didn’t play the politics the way it was supposed to be played. Fourthly, business and religion don’t mix too well and I did not understand that very early. Dove was a great idea; Daddy G.O (Pastor Adeboye) was very supportive, contrary to what some people were saying. He never muscled me when I was running Dove Media, except towards the end based on what people told him. I have no problem with him to be honest. 

People expect me to come out and criticize him, but I’ll never do that because he’s a man of God and my spiritual father and I respect him a lot and appreciate him. Now, could I have done a lot of things better? Certainly yes. I would have played the politics better, and probably not have gotten myself to a situation whereby I became an employee because I came into Dove as a consultant to raise money for them, not to come and run the company. I came in to raise the fund which was my special area, I didn’t know anything about the entertainment industry. 

Somehow, I ended up being the Managing Director of the company after raising funds for them. We were getting powerful and prominent. Like every set-up, it had its own politics, intrigues and I think I did not play it right because really, my problem with Dove was not what we were doing, contrary to what people thought. The chairman did not give us problem, he allowed us do whatever the vision was, even though he kept changing plans at the board meetings we had, we would be told to do a particular thing. 
But beyond, that I was given a free hand and needed not seek approval from anyone before I did my things. But unfortunately, I basically picked a fight with the wrong guy. 

That is the CEO of Dove Media, USA. He was my boss, my Provincial Pastor and there were things he was doing that ultimately led to where we were which I was not happy with. I was vocal about it and unfortunately he was much stronger than me within. He played the politics better than I could play it, and had access to the G.O and had ways of doing his things because he’s been with the Redeemed Church over the years, coupled with the fact that he’s an older man. My biggest mistake was that he played the politics than me. 

Some people tried to capitalize on the Charles Novia saga. They said I was reckless, mis-managed funds by giving so much money to Charles Novia and I just laughed. To be honest, people did not know the true story. I felt sorry for Charles Novia and myself because I was naïve and I should have known better because I was better trained. I’ve been to management school, so what happens with Charles Novia? I was accused of giving him N19 million to make movies. Yes, I gave him that much, but not in the way they said it. As a matter of fact, I think Charles Novia was not even paid enough. Because N19 million was not enough for the movies, it was about 26 movies. 

How could you do 26 movies with N19 million? That was what people did not get. Charles Novia was introduced to me by another pastor. I never knew him from Adam. He was brought to me by a pastor I trusted and we started talking. Along the line, I agreed I could work with him. I wanted to use a central person because I didn’t know the whole of Nollywood. So I thoughtthat if I could use somebody I trusted, he could be the link. 

We got talking and a lot of ideas kept coming up. I was so excited, and new in the industry. We made Covenant Church with about N6 million and I think we made more than three times of what we paid him because on the first day of the film’s release, we sold about 67,000 copies. We didn’t have enough copies. We only went with about 70 000 copies. Nobody had ever done that in the industry, the movie was fantastic. It means day one we made about N7.6 million profit and we had an endorsement of about N6 million before it was released. 

Intercontinental Bank gave us money and there was a management company which paid us N3 million for the right to market Covenant. That was how I promoted the movie. They actually paid me to do the markettting right. The point about Charles Novia was that we started talking and an idea came because we felt that the strongest asset that Dove Media had was Daddy G.O and the Redeemed Christian Church of God and we felt we could leverage that into the product. There, we would dramatize the spectacular miracles that came out of the Holy Ghost service. 

It would be an evangelical movie, commercial and truly Redeemed, it meets all the criteria. I thought I was being smart, that was why I was called being naïve. Remember, one of the objectives of Dove Media was to build a satellite television network. The rest of the idea came as a means of income to service that vision because I realized even after being given the job that in 20 years, it will still be profitable, I mean the Christian television base. While we were at it, we only had N510 million which was peanuts in the TV business. We now said rather than going straight for that channel where we may not be able to re-coup more money, we should create income streams. We would then be putting that into the channel development. 

That was the strategy I came up with that brought about the idea of movie distribution, having a studio, Internet; we have the Dove Link. People don’t even know about that. Coming back to Charles, we now came about with the idea of the encounter with the Holy Spirit and that it would be in series on Dove TV. It would run for 13 weeks for a quarter, but there will be a one hour movie, a soap. I now had a deal with Charles that there would be an hour movie dramatizing miracles that came out of the Holy Ghost service. After finishing the movie, it would show as a series on Dove TV and we would market it because it came in different names. 

Out of it is what we called The Ovary, The AIDS patient, we released three before I left. So there was supposed to be 13 movies and I told Charles that one of the ways we could make money on it was that if we shoot all the movies at once. Perhaps, one month, get the cast, mix up the casts but for different story lines. So when we do that, we don’t need to pay them for individual films. He now agreed they could do the encounter for the Holy Ghost for N800,000 per movie. To me, I thought I was scoring a spectacular deal, because then I thought good English movies were made for between N2 million and N3million.

We had just agreed to pay N6 million for Covenant Church. All of a sudden, I was going to get equivalent of 13 movies for an average of N800,000 and that to me was a bargain and that was the problem. If I were to do it now, I would pay him more because you can’t make a very good movie for N850,000 . But Charles Novia, whether out of naivety on his own side or greed, I don’t know, agreed for 13 movies at N850,000 each. He now said for that to work, he would need 70 percent of the money up front which makes sense and that was what I paid him. We paid around N9 million for the Encounters with the Holy Ghost. We were supposed to come there with 13 movies, not a series neither soap. 13 individual movies with different titles, story lines; The Ovaries, Aids Patients, The Blind Man. He wrote them out and I have a copy with me. 

So, that was that. He came to my office virtually daily. There was a day he came, which was like about four days after that, he came up with idea of making parables, making movies from the parables of Jesus Christ. For example, the parable of the sower, parable of the prodigal son. We could do a 70-minute movie on the parables of Jesus Christ which we could use on the TV channel for a whole quarter. Parables also were supposed to be 13 movies that would be shot as parables series and we agreed that would cost about N650,000 per movie and that was about N9 million in addition to the first N10 million for the first movie and that was where the N19 million came from. 

Did he get some percentage from that?
Yes, he also got 70 percent of it. So the idea was that at the end of the day, I thought I was making a kill because when you have a wonderful idea and it doesn’t work, you will look stupid, but when it works they would have been hailing me as a genius because we would have gotten 26 movies for the price of N19 million, which is at an average of N750,000 per movie. These are movies that have big stars in them. He did a good job, not these chicken change movies. But now, I think where the whole thing unraveled was when it was time for delivery and Charles did not deliver. And this is where my naivety came in and I said I made a mistake. 

Rather than fighting him, I could have reached a compromise with him. I kept holding him to the contract. I should have been realistic as a business man by giving him more money provided he was out of cash that is why he was delaying. He delivered two and started telling stories because apparently he gave the remaining movies to different directors that did not deliver. 

Did Pastor Adeboye speak to you all through the saga?
No. They never let me see GO. They kept telling me he was busy. I wrote him a letter and told him I was sorry if I disappointed him in anyway because to me, the man gave us all the support we could ever hope for in terms of raising the money and promoting it. If there is anybody that should be angry, it should be the GO because he put his name on the line and supported us. I felt bad about that and wrote a heartfelt apology for that. I never got a response. I even copied Elder Ohiwerei because I believe I should take responsibility for my actions as the CEO. I let them know things I did were not out of malice or recklessness. I did my best and if I made a mistake, I was sorry. I even travelled back the second month from the US to Nigeria to see the GO but couldn’t see him, after sometime, I just gave up. 

Have you been able to see him since then?
No. But I know that one day I will. I don’t have issues with him and I don’t believe he has issues with me other than Dove Media did not go the way it was supposed to go. Dove is not dead, it is still there. It is just that it has different focus from the way I was taking it. Towards the end, I heard they complained that we were making too many secular movies. I heard people said Two Brothers and The prodigal son was too secular. But please if you are going to depict the story of a prodigal son who came back to the Lord, how are you going to do it other than smoking and carrying women? Which is what we did. Some people criticised it, wrote petition to the GO.

Did you have issues with Pastor Adeyokunnu?
He was chairman of Dove Media, US and he was Daddy GO’s brother-in-law, he could do anything he liked. I was a nobody in the Redeemed Christian Church, but I felt he caused Nigeria a very big opportunity with Wal Mart in US by writing that letter he had no business writing. The whole idea behind the deal was to control the means of distribution after which you can now control the content. We were almost on the way to controlling the content of Nollywood. We had started telling producers what we wanted and what we did not. I have no regrets. I did the best I could. There is nobody who worked then that won’t tell you I did my best. I was there 18 hours a day. 

But some people were alleging financial misappropriation.
No, I don’t think anybody is alleging that, if they are, they can come out, the records are there. What they said was recklessness, that I spent money anyhow. 

Did you speak with the new MD, Patrick Abraham after you left?
We did. We were exchanging texts and he was the one that went to tell GO that I was going to sue RCCG. I don’t know where they got that from. How can I sue The Redeemed Church? For what? I will never do that. I will not join issues with him or anybody. Like I said before, I have nothing but love, thankfulness for Daddy GO and Dove Media for giving me an opportunity to get into the industry.

Source: www.sunnewsonline.com
All men are dogs 
She insisted she was the girl next door. The okada riders in Mazamaza, Lagos, didn’t think so. They saw through her designer sunglasses and collected N250 for leading her to The Sun Corporate Office, a service that ordinarily cost only N50. Their rationale for charging her 500% more than everybody else was because she is now a star. They are right, aren’t they? But the journey has been long for this once troublesome girl who preferred football to dolls. Uche Jombo let us into her world: the intimate details of her hero, her father, Nelson Jombo, the man who shaped her world view of men and marriage and why we should stop blaming men for not being able to keep their zips up. In tears, she told the story of the father she loved to bits but who ‘refused’ to live beyond 57 years.

Mike Awoyinfa, Dimgba Igwe, Funke Egbemode and Sam Olatunji were there.
Sunday, June 14, 2009

Uche Jumbo Photo: Sun News Publishing

More Stories on This Section

I was such a difficult child that my mother told me I must have at least one child to do to me what I did to her.

I was born in Enugu. Later, my dad moved back to Aba. My childhood is a huge part of where I am today. I was not an easy child. My mother used to say I must have a child like me and I would say no, what if I don’t want to have a children and she would tell me I must have one and go through what I made her go through. I did everything a teenager would do and more. I climbed trees, played football and played cowboy. I’m short-sighted and that is as a result of a clothes hanger entering my eyes. I was the only female playing football with boys. 

At that point, my mum had given up because she felt I thought I was a boy. It was then that a friend told her to put me in a drama group in church. They called the group Children of the Lord. We ministered every Sunday but I was not happy because I thought my mother wanted to curtail my excesses. Later, when I heard they gave scholarship every quarter, I started competing to win. That was the only time I had acting experience. I have played every woman in the Bible (laughter). It was a very good starting point for me. When I told Fidelis Duker I still remember some of the lines I played in the church, he told me to read the last one I played. I read the lines of Ruth and he was impressed that I could still remember my lines of over six years.

My father said Abriba girls don’t act.
At a point, my dad said, ‘you are an Abiriba girl, you cannot act or disgrace the family name.’ Ten years ago when I was starting out as an actor, if you say you wanted to act, it is like you had given up on life. That is why it gives me joy when mothers stop me to say I should help their children that want to act. And now my uncles refer to me as their niece in interviews. It is a lovely feeling. I never thought that would happen.

An Abiriba girl is expected to go to school, marry and make babies but I broke the myth
An Abiriba girl just goes to school, prepares herself, gets married and stay there. Sometimes, an Abiriba man will tell you to sit at home and be a full-time housewife. He feels it is an affront if you go out and work. I sit back and hear lots of stories come out of my culture. Where I’m coming from, I’m larger than life because you have so many things in front of you telling you you cannot break out of this chain or life. But I have been able to break out.

Some say it is even unheard of for an Abiriba girl to marry from outside Abiriba.
But my mother is not Abiriba. Even my elder sister, who is the first child of a first son, did not marry an Abiriba man. That is to tell you how strong my mum is. I think she was able to give us the opportunity to be whatever we want to be irrespective of the culture. 

So far, I have not dated an Abiriba man. I’m not saying I have not dated an Ogbo man but an Abiriba man, no and I cannot say who I have dated in the papers. Maybe somebody dey there dey count for me (general laughter). 

Today, I’m an Abiriba girl who stood for what she believed in and is living her dream
I’m just the girl next door. What I mean by that is those close to me know me as Uche Obi and not the popular Uche Jombo that people know. I think at a point you have to surround yourself with people who know you and can tell you the truth. 

The Jombo name is both a blessing and a curse. Jombo is my real name. In Abriba, the Jombo is a popular family name. It is not a nickname. Every Jombo in Abriba is related to me.

Every Abiriba person is believed to be strong in business and I am no exception. 
I think I work harder because of where I come from. In the beginning, my father would not hear jack from me as per acting. He went on and on to tell me I’m an Abiriba girl because at a point Abiriba girls were seen but not heard. So, I’m proud to be an Abiriba girl who stood for what she believed in and is living her dream. 

Fidelis Duker gave me my first on-screen opportunity.
It happened by accident. I had taken a letter to Fidelis Duker as one of the marketers of REEL Awards. When I got there, there were so many people; I think I was number 50 or so. When I got inside, he did not even look at me, he just pushed the script in front of me and said read. I said, ‘I’m not here to read; I’m here to give you this.’ He looked up from his table and said, ‘what’s that supposed to mean?’ He said, ‘you are not an actress and you can’t act.’ I said, no, ‘I’m not an actress but I can act.’ He asked how I knew I could act. I told him three years of my secondary school was sponsored by a scholarship from an Acting School. He asked if I had acted in front of a camera and I said no. He told me to read for him and I did. I walked away with the Linda role. Fidelis Duker was the first person to give me the on-screen opportunity. That was in Images. I don’t think he has paid me for that job (laughter). Actually, he was the first person that made me believe I could do this aside my sister.

Being an Igbo girl does not guarantee success in Nollywood
After Images, I started working with people that were on the same set. I did My Visa To Hell and Adure, which was my first lead. People always thought it was my first film. It wasn’t; it was just that it came out before My Visa To Hell.

Being an Igbo girl does not give you an edge in this business. I don’t think so. If anybody should know I think I should because I don’t think I saw success like this five years ago. I don’t think there is any tribal sentiment. People that say that are just too lazy to go out there to look for job or package themselves for the job.

The famed sex-for-role does not exist
Anybody coming into the industry must first believe in himself. It starts with believing in yourself. Trust me, the disappointment will come but your belief in yourself will keep you going. As for the sex-for-role thing, it doesn’t exist. If it does I would have been a star long before now.

My father, my hero and why I think men are dogs
My father is dead but he was my first hero. He is the reason I think there is love and I also think men are dogs. The truth of the matter is, it is not their fault. It is the way they are built. It is not possible for a man to be faithful no matter how much he loves a woman. Remove religion out of it; it is not just possible. My dad is an Abiriba man, He was the first son and he was married to someone from Mbaise. You can imagine that. I watched my parents’ drama unfold in front of me. I sometimes blackmailed him at a point when I caught him with a woman (laughter) but I never squealed to my mum. Why should I tell when I was busy collecting money from the man? (laughter) . I cannot tell you how many times I caught him with girlfriends because I’m only running my mouth now that he is dead.

My mum was strict. She was always cancelling stuff from the list we brought from school. It was what she approved that my dad would buy. I would wait and just go and meet my dad in his office. I would tell him I wanted to collect money for the stuff my mother cancelled from the list and he would give me. I have not seen any man who loves a woman the way he loved my mum but if he could do that, it means love does not guarantee faithfulness. There was pressure on him to marry an Abriba woman when they were giving him a chieftaincy title but he refused. That still did not stop him from having girlfriends.

Every woman deserves a man who loves her more than she loves him
It is not the men’s fault; it is just the way they were made. Trust me, my dad is everything I want in a husband if I eventually see one. I want a man who could root for me; who could trust me when everybody is against me. I think every woman deserves a man who loves her more than she loves him. Because of the animalistic thing in man, they have tendencies to take a walk. But a woman, especially an African woman, cannot take a walk because when you are divorced whether you like it or not you are a tokunbo. Even the men that come to you feel you should be happy they are coming.

I wish my father had lived long enough to see where I am today
He had family values. As far as I’m concerned, I don’t know a better Abiriba man than my dad. He always spoke his language to you whether you understood it or not. He was proud of his heritage. My only regret is that he is not here. I would have loved to tell him I told you so, see where I am. He didn’t believe I was strong enough for this. 

I’m a combination of both my parents. I want to believe I took after their strength but I don’t know whom I took the stubborn thing from.

Here’s the point she broke down and cried. We switched off our recorders in memory of Chief Nelson Jombo.

My dad died at 57 but he smoked actively for 35 years
My father’s death is something I don’t want to talk about (sobbing). My dad is the reason I can never smoke or marry somebody who smokes. I don’t want to talk about my dad (crying). My dad didn’t die by accident. He died of bronchitis. That is what you get when you smoke for too long. He lungs were infected. 
In this industry, most people feel they have to smoke to be hip.

I was shocked when someone called me to say they wrote that I smoke. I had a good laugh. I could do any other thing but smoking is something I will never do because it killed my dad. Those close to me that smoke don’t feel comfortable doing it around me. Smoking is not something people can give up for you. My dad was still smoking while undergoing treatment because it was an addiction. My dad died at 57 but he smoked actively for 35 years. The man smoked a major part of his life. I always argued with him not to smoke. If you presented your reasons against smoking, he would tell you he had been smoking before you were born.

I cannot accommodate a cheating husband
I can’t. My dad is the reason I see that that is the way men are created. But that does not mean I will accommodate it. I take pride in being an African woman. I can’t take the fact that someone should tell me there is nothing I can do about a cheating husband because I’m an African woman. I don’t think that should be the case. To whom much is given much is expected. I demand as much as I give. When I give you so much in a relationship, it is only logical that I demand as much. 

I don’t know if I can accept a man who is unfaithful. I don’t think I can accept a man who doesn’t have family values or who thinks I should be happy that he is in my life. He should be the one that is happy I’m in his life. Anybody who is going to end up with me is the winner. There is nothing saying I must get married as an African woman. I have not seen the right man. Someone can be a perfect boyfriend and not be a perfect husband. 

If you can get 70% on the list of what you want in a man, then you have gotten your perfect man. 
In a relationship, there are things you can take in a marriage and there are things you wouldn’t. The transition from being single is drastic. Most men still prefer women to sit at home and not work and I wonder why. Yet they are still attracted to women who are working. That goes a long way to tell you about men. There is no perfect man. All those people who say they are waiting for a perfect man are deceiving themselves. If there is a perfect man, there won’t be God. If you can get 70% on the list of what you want in a man, then you have gotten your perfect man.

The media and Nollywood marriages
It is the same press that say Nollywood marriages don’t last that always ask when we will get married. The fact that somebody is on the screen does not mean the person is not human. The only difference is that everything you do is under scrutiny. It annoys me sometimes when people look at you as different from other human beings. I guess it is just one of the curses of this job. It is just that the blessings are more. 
People who don’t know jack about you talk about you. The junk journalists supply them with stories that are not true except the correct spelling of your name. Sometimes they get mine wrong. They spell Jombo with a ‘u’. So, you have to defend yourself to people who really know you and you wonder what you have to do with people who don’t know you. 

The media can only speculate about my relationships. They can never hear it from me. I know that if you want your relationship to grow, you have to keep it out of the press.

Life is one big stage and we are all actors
What you become in life is not about what you read in school; it is all about talent. I think all of us are actors. It is just that some of us have decided to make money with our talents. If you check out life, who you are in the presence of our kids is different from who you are in the presence of visitors. We all act at different levels of our lives. It is just that we don’t realise it.

I have no regrets dumping statistics. Luckily, my dad is not alive to hear that. I don’t have regrets at all. Two of my classmates are in my employment now. One is actually my primary school classmate while the other was my classmate in secondary school. It is just about them knowing who I am from when I was born.
So, it is about what you do with what you have acquired. I don’t think any knowledge gained is wasted.

My first script, Ordained, was produced eight years ago
I started writing when I started acting. It was just that people did not know. My first script that was produced, Ordained, was about eight years ago. It is just that I’m mostly known as an actress. But I will not tell you how much I earn.

I am a success story
I am as successful as I can get. I think my career speaks for itself. Success is being fulfilled at what you do and in all modesty, I am a success story. As for failure, I think you cannot know success if you had not known failure. I have known failure in every area of my life. For me to get here, I must have known failure. For you to say you are successful, you must have known failure.
There had been times I felt like quitting. when my career wasn’t going the way I wanted. People were telling me to go and get (another) job. There was a point I felt I was tired but I never stopped believing in myself.

I cut my dreadlocks to repackage myself for new roles
It’s showbiz. At a time I was always getting a particular role and I needed to prove that I can act other roles. So, I cut my hair because I had dreadlocks and I totally repackaged myself. And you won’t believe it, I started playing other roles. The truth is, if producers see you in a particular role, you have to do something drastic to convince them that you can play other roles. You have to be able to look at your jobs and learn. That is why I find it funny when people say they don’t watch their own films. You must not get to a stage where you stop learning. I never stop learning. Every day is a learning process. I watch my films to learn more.

Kissing on screen
I don’t think kiss on screen is real kiss. I have not really played kissing on the screen.

I’m a sucker for good dialogue 
I’m a sucker for good dialogue. When I see good dialogue I sink into it. Being an actor is a privilege because you are able to live another life and come out of it and still be you. I had to first of all fall in love with the script. 

The characters I play do not affect me. Rather they teach me. When you play the role of a drug addict, you know the evil of drugs. I learn from the character I have played.

My rating of actresses
Mercy Johnson is drama queen, Ini Edo is charismatic, Omotola is lucky. It is not easy to be having kids and still remain on the A-list. Ramsey is a cross-breed. Emeka Ike, that is my bros now. Bimbo Akintola, she is just Bimbo. And yes, there is rivalry in the industry. It might not be on the surface but it is there.

Ini Edo and I
She is my friend and still my friend. 
That is the press trying to find something out of nothing. They said all kinds of things about why I was not at her wedding but the truth is i didn’t because I was working. I wasn’t released and she understands. Ini is my friend and she is still my friend. As far as friendship is concerned, you hear things about each other. I saw it in the paper and we spoke about it.

Journalists make up all kinds of stories about how there is so much in-fighting in the industry. They need to make some people scapegoats. For instance that one actor ended up playing a role originally cast for another person is nothing new or unusual. I don’t think there is any actor alive who has not played somebody’s role.