May
30th
THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES,How to Express Heartfelt commitment to Your Mate
By toniasexy
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love language #1 ---------------------
WORDS OF AFFIRMATION
One way to express love emotinally is to use
words that build up.Solomon,author of the ancient Hebrew wisdom
literature,wrote, "The tongue has the power of life and death."
Many couples have never learned the tremendous power of verbally
affirming each other. Solomon further noted," An anxious heart
weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up."Verbal compliments or word of apprciation, are powerful communication of love. They are best expressed in simple, straightforward statement of affirmation, such as:
" You look sharp in that suit."
" Do you ever look nice in that dress!wow!"
" You must be the best potato cook in the world. I love these potatoes."
What would happen to the emotional climate of a marriage if the husband and wife heard such words of affirmation regularly? The object of love is not getting something you want but doing something for the well being of the one you love. It is a fact, however, that when we recieve affirming words we are far more likely to be motivated to reciprocate and do something our spouse desires.
WAYS TO GIVE WORDS OF AFFIRMATION
a) ENCOURAGING WORDS.
Giving verbal compliments is only one way to express words of affirmation to your spouse. another dialect is encouraging words. The word encourage means "to inspire courage" All of us have areas in which we feel insecure. we lack courage, and that lack of courage often hinders us from accomplishing the positive things that we would like to do. The latent potential within your spouse in his or her areas of insecurity may await your encouraging words.
b) KIND WORDS
Love is kind. If then we are to communicate love verbally, we must use kind words. That has to do with the way we speak. The same sentence can have two different meanings, depending on how you say it. The statement "I love you," when said with kindness and tenderness, can be genuine expression of love. But what about the statement "I love you?. the question mark changes the whole meaning of those three words. sometimes our words are saying onething, but our tone of voice is saying another thing. The manner in which we speak is exceedingly important. An ancient sage once said," A soft answer turns away anger."
------------------- Love language #2 -----------------
QUALITY TIME
By quality time, i mean giving someone your undivided attention. I dont mean sitting on the couch watching television together, but sitting on the couch with the TV off, looking at each other and talking, giving each other your undivided attention.
SOME WAYS OF SPENDING QUALITY TIME:-
A) TOGETHERNESS:-
A central aspect of quality time is togetherness. I do not mean proximity. Two people sitting in the same room are in close proximity, but they are not necessarily together. Togetherness has to do with focused attention.
Quality time does not mean that we have to spend our together moments gazing into each other's eyes. it means that we are doing something together and that we are giving our full attention to the other person. The activity is the vehicle that creates the sense of togetherness.
b) QUALITY CONVERSATION:-
By this i mean, sympathetic dialogue where two individuals are sharing their experiences, thoughts, feelings and desire in a friendly, uninterrupted context. Quality conversation focus on what we are hearing.
------------- Love language #3 ----------------
RECIEVING GIFTS:-
A gift is something you can hold in your hand and say,"Look he/she was thinking of me," or, "he/she remenbered me. you must be thinking of someone to give him/her a gift. The gift itself is a symbol of that thought. It doesnt matter whether it costs money. What is important is that you thought of him/her. And it is not the thought implanted only in the mind that counts, but the thoughts expressed in actually securing the gifts and giving it as the expression of love.
Gifts are visual symbol of love. Visual symbol of love are more important to some people than to others. There are ways of giving:-
a) Gifts and Money
b)The gift of self or the gift of presence.
-------------- Love Language #4 -------------------
ACTS OF SERVICE:-
By acts of service, i mean doing things
you know your spouse would like you to do. you seek to please him/her by serving him/her, to express your love for him/her by doing things. Such actions like cookimg a meal, setting a table,washing dishes,vacuuming, cleaning a commode, e.t.c are all acts of service. They require thought, planning, time, effort and energy to do them. If done with a positive spirit, they are indeed expression of love.
---------------- Love Language #5 ---------------
PHYSICAL TOUCH:-
We have long known that physical touch is a way of communicating emotional love. physical touch is a powerful vehicle for communicating marital love. Holding hands, kissing, embracing and sexual intercourse are all ways of communicating love to someone. For some individuals, physical touch is their primary love language. Without it, they feel unloved. Sexual intercourse, however is only one dialect in the love language of physical touch.
Physical touch can make or break a relationship. It can communicate hate or love. To the person whose primary love language is physical touch, the message will be be far louder than the words "I love you" or " I hate you."
My dear friends, as u read this, apply the right principles, learn the right love language of your spouse, and soon you'll know the profound satisfaction and joy of being able to express your love - and feeling truly loved in return.
I wish you happy reading as you learn the love languages and how to express them to your loved ones.
Toniasexy
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